Do you ever do the right thing wondering why it doesn’t lift you up or increase your sense of self-worth/love?
The only reason why that might be the case is that you do not love yourself or what you are doing. If you are at destination X and you want to get to Y feeling better about yourself you have to feel better about yourself right now.
Try a gratefulness exercise where you let your subconscious mind spit everything it has while you are writing reasons to be happy about. Let your subconscious mind guide you to your answers, trust the process as it will widen your appreciation for what you have and you will find that you have much more things to be grateful about; the number of things you can be grateful for is unlimited. The process is the valuable part, not the results. Results will be truly fulfilling only if you fall in love with the process.